Trust & The Delay of Understanding
The need to understand what is happening when we are undergoing some trial is sometimes simply an expression of an inability to abandon ourselves trustingly to God and a search for human security. We must be purified of that. Full inner freedom comes from progressively freeing ourselves from the need for human security through the realization that God alone is our “rock,” as Scripture says.
The liberating of intelligence from the desire for control and the need to seek security instead of abandoning ourselves to God requires that we pass through certain phases in our lives — unquestionably the most painful of all—in which we simply cannot understand the reasons for what is happening. What then? Then we must seek enlightenment by reflecting, praying, and asking the advice of appropriate people; thanks to this light, and by cooperating with what we learn, we will make progress. Yet there also are periods when we must renounce all efforts to decode the mystery. The time has come to stop our activity and abandon ourselves to God with blind trust. Light will come later. “What I am doing you do not understand now, but afterword you will understand,” our Lord tells St. Peter. At that stage, trying to understand at all costs would do us more harm than good. It would increase our suffering instead of soothing it and exacerbate our doubts, insecurity, fears, and questions without providing any answer. Then we must make acts of faith. The only thing that can bring us peace is humble and trusting prayer—the attitude expressed by the prophet Jeremiah: “It is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord.”
from Interior Freedom by Fr. Jacques Philippe pp.53-54.